I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
