hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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