he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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