I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
