I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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