so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
We are two peas in an std pod
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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