Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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