Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
