it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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