he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
