he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Randomize
