I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
im six kinds of drunk right now
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
