she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
