There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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