we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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