The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
