Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
