Dual....:-)
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
