Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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