are you still at the devil's house?
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
