whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
