there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
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