so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize