Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
