Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
