i think i have herpe
just one?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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