Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Randomize
