I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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