So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
