last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
