her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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