Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
