And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
