I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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