I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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