honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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