I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize