it wasn't lemon gatorade
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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