this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
