he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I just forgot I was standing up.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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