oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
