i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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