I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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