normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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