He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
