I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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