Tell her she can't have a vagina
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
