it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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