found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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