I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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